The national day is the day when many people enjoy a lot of beer from early in the morning. As the clock passes 1300, pretty much all Norwegians are very drunk and enjoying themselves. Here are the first pictures of people enjoying themselves:
Nasjonaldagen er dagen da mange koser seg veldig masse med masse øl fra tidlig på morgenen. Etter hvert som klokken passerer 1300 er stort sett alle nordmenn veldig fulle og koser seg masse. Her er de første bildene av folk som koser seg:
Leif-Gunnar and Lill-Anette Knikke from Rælingen are distraught. They have a son who next week turns 28. For the past four weeks he has been staying at home with his parents after he had to be quarantined after a trip to Italy a couple of months ago. Now the parents insist that their son is likely to not be allowed to move out after the quarantine period is over
Having a great time The son tells eAvisa that the quarantine time with his parents has been fantastic. “We’re together every day and night, we watch movies together and mom dishes up with several meals every single day. I’m having a great time. he smiles. He sees no reason to move back to his 43 sqm apartment in Oslo. “Ha ha ha, no I’m better off here. Taking care of my parents” he says while taking another beer from his father’s refrigerator
I don’t know what to say. The parents, on the other hand, seem a little annoyed and very despairing. “We’re afraid we’ll never get rid of him,”says mother Lill-Anette as her lower lip trembles. She’s almost in tears. “He’s been here every day for 4 weeks now. I wash clothes, cook and have to sit and listen to everything he’s interested in. I feel like my life has been paused. He’s got to move out. says the mother before the emotions take over and she erupts into tears. “Mymom is touched and happy to have me here,” says the son, who obviously thinks he is welcome to continue living with his parents.
The Government has finally given room for Norwegians to function as before after the restrictions due to the Corona virus have characterized our social life. This means friends can now finally meet looking at their mobile in groups up to 20 people
Max 20 people The Government has thus opened the way for Norwegians to meet to stare at their mobile phones. 20 people are max, but for most of us it will be more than enough. Social life can start again as we know it: Mobile, together, little talking, lots of likes. “We know that people have been looking forward to being together while they stare at their mobile so this is amazing,” mobile expert Birger Høy Stakk told eAvisa
Back to normal With their mobile in hand, Norwegians should be able to enjoy themselves together again. “There won’t be many conversations, but just being able to experience staring at your phone without being alone is a dream“says Mobile Minister Raymond Ring Smart. He has an Iphone, but has several friends who have Android mobiles. “Yes I’m generous like that”he says while smiling like a real good boy
What are you thinking, is it nice that life is underway again and that we can be together while we stare at the phone?
At the Norwegian Centre for Interpersonal Relations, they have been researching for several years on which group of people jog the least in Norway. The answer is unconditional; The more sweatpants you own, the less you jog
Never jogged eAvisa has called over 400 Norwegians in recent weeks and looked at the connection between owning sweatpants and actually jogging. Surprisingly, none of the 400 people we talked to were jogging. However, all of them wore one or more sweatpants that they wore every day.
Sweatpants and cuddles In fact, the comprehensive research report shows that those who wear sweatpants also eat the most junk food, drink the most alcohol and mostly never jog. “We see that everyone with sweatpants is usually either overweight, alcoholic or not washes. They call it “cuddle” says researcher and potential serial killer Karl Aksel Ivan Gladvold to eAvisa. So; conclusion is clear, sweatpants are rarely or never used for jogging
There is great agreement among the world’s Corona experts. After many months of discussions, it seems that they all agree on one thing; This is going well or it doesn’t. “The most important thing now is that we wait and see. Yes and that we continue to wash our hands” experts say
Can go all the way Since Corona is a brand new virus, experts agree that no one can really be an expert on the Corona virus. “It’s impossible to say, This can go all the way” corona expert Ole Utfor Bakke told eAvisa. He thinks the Corona situation is either now finished or that this isn’t even the start.
I don’t really know anything. When it comes to vaccine, all the world’s experts have said that the vaccine will either come in the summer, next spring, at the earliest in 2022 or never. So that’s the way it is with that thing. Vaccine comes sooner or later or so it doesn’t come at all.
“At least Corona has come to stay. Either that or so, it’ll soon go away.” concludes corona expert
The government has today issued a press release warning that it will ban future parents from calling their child Ronny. The reason is that those named Ronny now represent 91% of all crime and unemployment in Norway. “We need to end this, society simply can’t afford more Ronnys now,” says the Prime Minister
No longer going It has for many years been considered to ban the name Ronny, but for strange reasons it has never been carried out. Prime Minister Erna Solberg tells eAvisa that as of 01.01.2021 it will no longer be possible to call your child Ronny. “We’re doing this for the next generation. With this ban, we believe in a sharp reduction in crime already from 2045” says Erna
Volvo races While the vast majority react positively to the ban, car brand Volvo is raging over the government’s proposal. The reason is that a whopping 99% of all older Volvo models sold are sold to people named Ronny. “We do not support this ban in any way. It’s almost racist.” says marketing manager at Volvo Norway Odd-Ronny-Bjørnar Dekkstad in an email consisting only of block letters
What do you mean, is it okay to ban the name Ronny?
Regjeringen har idag sendt ut en pressemelding der de varsler at de vil forby fremtidige foreldre å kalle barnet sitt Ronny. Grunnen er at de som heter Ronny nå representerer 91% av all kriminalitet og arbeidsledighet i Norge. “Vi må få slutt på dette, samfunnet har rett og slett ikke råd til flere Ronnyer nå” sier statsministeren
Går ikke lenger Det har i mange år vært vurdert å forby navnet Ronny, men av merkelige grunner har det aldri blitt gjennomført. Statsminister Erna Solberg sier til eAvisa at det fra og med 01.01.2021 ikke lenger vil være mulig å kalle barnet ditt for Ronny. “Vi gjør dette for neste generasjon. Med dette forbudet tror vi på en kraftig redusering i kriminaliteten allerede fra 2045” sier Erna
Volvo raser Mens de aller fleste reagerer positivt på forbudet raser bilmerket Volvo over forslaget til regjeringen. Grunnen er at hele 99% av alle eldre Volvo-modeller som blir solgt blir solgt til personer som heter Ronny. “Dette forbudet støtter vi ikke på noen måte. Det er nærmest rasistisk” sier markedssjef i Volvo Norge Odd-Ronny-Bjørnar Dekkstad i en mail kun bestående av blokkbokstaver
Hva mener du, er det greit at man forbyr navnet Ronny?
New evidence is emerging that the incumbent US president has been developed in China’s laboratory to destroy peace and order in the UNITED States and the Western world in general. “There is no longer any doubt. Donald Trump is the result of aggressive ire like we’ve never put it before.” professor Lars Nedover Bakke told eAvisa
Has removed many human properties The study shows that at first glance, Trump can both look and appear like an ordinary human being. “Yesit is well done, but the moment he starts talking one notices that it lacks human qualities such as empathy, humility, intelligence and charm” says the researcher. He believes China is behind Donald Trump
China is not responding eAvisa has repeatedly tried to get in touch with the Chinese Embassy in Oslo for a comment. It has not been successful to connect with any representatives at the embassy, but a Chinese chef from Mjøndalen tells eAvisa that it is China that is behind Donald Trump. We see no reason to question the Chinese chef and thus conclude that joda; Donald Trump is the result of a vicious warfare carried out at the Chinese laboratory
What do you mean? Does it seem plausible. Say your opinion by block letters in the comments everywhere on the internet
The vast majority of us make some preparations when we go out to the mall to shop. We wash ourselves a little, put on clothes and make sure the clothes sit where they are going. Most do, but not these:
